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The tubular rocking cradle with the headrest that promised perfect crunches without the neck strain — rock forward, feel the burn, order now. Flip channels late at night in the mid-'90s and the Ab Roller infomercial was simply there, somewhere, always.
The chalky-sweet protein shake that lived in every 2000s gym bag, GNC aisle, and locker room — with the all-time-great fine print: Muscle Milk contains no milk. The name said milk, the label said otherwise, and eventually the FDA had thoughts.
Twelve DVDs, ninety days, a pull-up bar wedged in the doorframe, and a magic phrase — "muscle confusion." Tony Horton's basement bootcamp was the infomercial phenomenon of the late 2000s, and for a while it seemed like every dad, coworker, and college roommate in America was "doing P90X."
Nintendo released a scale that played minigames, and somehow convinced the whole family to step on it every morning as entertainment. Yoga in the living room, soccer-ball heading by leaning, and a daily Body Test with opinions about your BMI — the fitness moment of 2008, long before the home-workout industrial complex.